Between need, preference and wants. Oh and a little insight on me.

Just listing it as a reminder to myself, of what the 23 year old me think is needed, preferred and wanted in a partner.

I read the article on 'Why Men Are Settling for Mrs. Good Enough' and 'To Find Mr. Right You Need to Stop Looking for Mr. Perfect'.

Your options are fewer as more criterias are added to your list. Hence, I would like to look at 'The List' which I have gathered over the years.

The Needed

1. A beautiful Smile

This is and has always been my number one requirement. It doesn't matter if your drop dead gorgeous, dress well and so. But if you keep on sulking up and making sour faces, it does not attract at all. People smile genuinely when they are happy, and a happy person is beautiful in every single way that they are. :)

2. Understand that I have my weak spots, and I'm trying to improve it. I guess this is true for everyone. Virgo are perfectionist, but I've known since long that to be perfect itself requires imperfection, hence its a real paradox. Marriage is between two people and the marriage is never perfect, but we can always strive to make it perfect till the day we die and beyond.

The Preferred

1. Long Hair.
I have this crush and preference for people with long hair but I always, almost always ended up with someone with a short hair. As long as that person is comfortable with the way she is, I'm comfortable. But hey, this is a preferred thing.

2. Wear dresses.
Yes girls, I know, shorts and pants are more comfy and less restricting. But hey, you look awesome in dress and don't deny it. Sundresses and night gown are just cool.

3. A little balance on the materialistic side.
I'm not against buying stuffs. I'm an accountant, deal with it. I place value over things. Of course, if it please you go ahead. But you don't need XXXX number of things? If the price is high, but its the best there is (Brand inclusive), then be my guest GO FOR IT. But I wouldn't be paying more than anything if a substitute could be obtain at a cheaper price. It just doesn't make any economical sense. *However if a person's perception is taken into place, then its gonna be way off, hence my point here is totally invalid.*

The Wants

1. Killer legs!

Nothing is more sexy than a girl with killer legs.

2. Proportional size.

Nothing to the overskinny or chubby people, but hey looks is a plus point. Its embedded into our genetics that we look for one who's attractive.

3. Squeaky voice.

There's just something sexy about this that I'm yet to understand.

4. Loves to travel.

Who doesn't?

5. Loves to cuddle.

Be my beary bear. Hugs are awesome!

6. Understand that in-laws can be a pain.

Marrying someone, you don't just marry that single person. The family comes as a package as well. It work both ways and although it will not be work most of the time, with quarrels and comments being thrown around (Hey, you're taking their precious away too!), there are time where we just have to listen and stay low. Less fights equates a more happy family. A word of advise, my mum ain't someone you can deal with. I gave up on that years ago.

7. Loves food.

Its hard to keep a figure with good food, I know. But hey, people can go easy on the volume and still love food at the same time. Either that or exercise more to lose those extra calories. Working out together, may it be jogging, cycling or anything is cool, after all, its doing thing together that counts.

8. Someone with a clear vision.

Someone with this kind of attitude knows what they want, and how to get there. They are willing to compensate, improvise and change to get what they want. And if its not destined for them to achieve that, they'll humbly accept the fact.

The okay, I'm good with that :)

1. Short.

I know i'm tall and its a bane. If you're fine with that, I'm totally cool with your height. Things might get hard along the way but hey, if we are in this together, we'll make things work somehow. Along the way, our differences can be the cause for more and more giggles.

2. Not have kids.

Hey I'm looking for someone to share my life with. Hence whether or not she wants children, thats a different story. Of course I prefer to have kids, between 2-3 if possible. But I'm honestly fine with almost any.

3. Clingy / Hermit

Totally a-o-kay with these two extremes. I just have to learn to get use to it.

4. Older/Younger than me.

As of now, I have this +/- 4 years range for me. Not too young, not too old (hey girls who are older than me, I ideally want to get married when I'm 27/8 or so. Best if its 30+. I'm 24 this year, and well, lets just say if you're fine with waiting, then by all means go ahead).

5. I'm willing to relocate.

I know I always said I rather have someone up north, or lately when I say that I rather marry someone from Penang cause its way easier and its my home town. But honestly speaking, anywhere is fine. If I'm really into you, why wouldn't I follow you or vice versa?

6. The wait.

Hey, I've been playing this waiting game for so long. Time / Distance doesn't matter to me. It'll work out eventually. (Of course if you're just toying around then it will never work out in the first place). Trust me, I've waited a long while *and still counting, the person probably doesn't even know it* 

7. You're smarter or more successful than me.

Obviously I want to beat you. But if by all means you're better, I should be happy for you right? Why would I want to wish something bad to the person I love? That just doesn't make sense. I'm competitive, deal with it. I'll be trying my best to be better than you but hey that is not a bad thing. I'm improving. Everyone's a winner.

Reason why I'm single.

Yes, I'm writing it down here. People probably wonder why I'm single. I can tell you the usual, I haven't met 'The One', I have insufficient time, I'm focusing on my career and all of that. But here are the actual reasons.

1. Low self-esteem / Too many reasons why I'm not compatible with you.

You'll probably find this weird as I'm usually someone with the WTH attitude and go for it, regardless. But as this is a matter of choosing a partner, you'll be often wondering whether you're good enough for that person. I'll settle for less, but I always want to be Mr. Perfect. The guy who can be there for you, understands you, be as good looking cause you're gorgeous, beautiful beyond compare, my Ms. Perfect.

And of course, I'm still wearing braces, super skinny with a wee bit of pimples on my face, a bad hairdo. I'm also without a nice car and place to stay (although I do have my own, this is for the materialistic kind, or those who have silver spoons who just can't get by).

With all this imperfections, who am I to be near you?

And hence, the problem with myself. I'm my own biggest wall.

2. First Impression doesn't matter, the second one does. I'm judgemental.

The list is here for a reason. I see you and I'll evaluate you. First look, I may find you gorgeous, with the nice body, manners and smiles to die for. But on the second glance, traces of your imperfection appears. 

'This girl isn't so pretty on second glance'.

'Hey, did she just say that?'

'On second look, bad match up. She's too boring, yadda yadda'.

If there's something wrong with you, I'll know it. The question then is, am I able to look beyond it. It takes time to know people, to understand the personality. People need to talk but hey, before we start talking (and I, discover your hidden gems), you're already tag and labelled and set aside. Tagging, is one of my bane.

So here you have it, 'The List' according to Adrian Koay.

As of now, I'm busy on weekdays and weekends (If classes are on). Schedule's pretty tight so I feel bad if I can't entertain you that much. For someone who doesn't have much to offer at this age, you can't blame me for having a 'slight' low esteem problem, aye?

And hence, this is why Adrian Koay have so many crushes but never went for any of them. I want to find someone, learn to love again and be in a relationship, make it work this time. But I just have to many excuses.

Peace out.